UNIVERSITY LIFE

Time pass really fast. Can't really believe myself are doing degree now. 19 this year!! my last year of being a 10's teens. increadible!!! I've lots of dreams, lots of thing which i want to do! but it all start with a thoughts, then a plan, then action...it all starts frm small thing.. sometimes i wander if i really can make it? do i have the abilityto forfill what i was called and destiny...As i look back what I've been doing these years back, I've realised that i always making the wrg decisions and being a irresponsible guy. I tried to find out what's my problems, what are the things holding me back frm growing. And i did it... this all happened bc of my attitude, my low esteem, and my pride inside of me... u may wander that will a guy like me be low esteem?? yes i will!!! I've always protect myself, i've close my door to prevent hurts... that's why i'm not a person who likes to express my feelings and problems to others... I've been always keeping my secrets all by myself and never wantted to share... seems that i do not have a trust for any ppl anymore. Hurts which i experienced had long hidden in my heart all these while...MY relationships problems is a mess!!!!! i've changed lots of gfs,and started to become a womenizer. I hated myself! I started to realised that my heart could not be faithful like last time... i've hurt a lot of ppl...I'M INDEED VERY SORRY TO ALL OF YOU!!! Is really my fault and mistakes.. i know that a word sorry could't make much difference... but i do not know what could i do desides saying sorry...EVERYTHING PAST!!! AND NOW I'LL START ALL OVER AGAIN! i'VE MAKE A PROMISE TO GOD THAT I MUST NOT START A NEW RELATIONSHIP TILL I GRADUATE AND, TILL I CAN BE A MUCH MATURE GUY AND A RESPONSIBLE GUY! Now what i wish and wantted to do is to study with all my heart, love God and ppl with all my heart and soul, SERVE HIM!!!I'm not trying to be spiritual, but to be a better guy and christian! I WILL NOT MAKE IT BY MYSELF, BUT BY THE STRENGTH OF GOD!!! I'm not trying to prove this to anyone else but to prove to myself that i can make it!!!